Dirty Little Secrets

i used to want
what i didn’t need,
now i need
what is out of reach.
my bed seems hollow,
indented by the crushing weight
of the past,
filled by the emptiness
of the future,
fixed in this moment,
trembling.
somewhere the line blurs
between ecstacy
and insanity,
waiting for the faintest light,
listening for night whispers
that seldom come
uninvited.

with my sad heart, that may not live nor die,
i look at you in sleep and dreams, and i sigh
and murmur sweet words into the silent stream
of your thoughts, i am one with the twilight’s dream.

deepening shade, star after star come They,
the Ancients clothed in gossamer array,
They gather close to gift us with Their dim caress,
whispering dreams with shadowy tenderness.

in our distant hopes, we are one with all the Wise,
let us dream beyond today where starlight never dies,
amid the wild, gentle thoughts, and dreams that dwell
where beauty calls to beauty in the dim silent spell.

I would love to undress you.
I suspect that beneath
the buttons you are
golden light, like amber
beckoning my attention
further below…
delightful or embarrassing,
depending on
how my undressing you
affects you.
I would note every breath,
weighing every moment
like a slow waltz,
to replay in my mind
later
when I close my eyes.